Planning a Wedding Day That Feels Intentional, Not Rushed: The Photographer’s Guide
Weddings have a way of becoming a blur. One moment you’re zipping up your dress, the next it’s midnight and your bouquet is slightly wilted, your cheeks hurt from smiling, and you’re wondering where the day went. But what if your wedding didn’t feel like a whirlwind? What if, instead, it felt slow, intentional, and soaked in presence?
Here’s how to plan your wedding day so that you don’t just get through it – you savour it. With gentle structure, breathing room, and mindful planning, you can actually remember the day you said I do. (And yes, I’ll be there to capture every luminous, honest moment.)
1. Start the Morning with Stillness: A Calm Beginning Sets the Tone
Before the make-up brushes and prosecco toasts, begin with a breath. A slow morning sets the tone for the rest of your day. Whether it’s journalling by a window, sipping tea in silence, or playing your favourite calming playlist while getting ready, let your wedding morning begin not with frenzy, but with intention.
If you’re looking to bring movement into that stillness, consider a wedding morning session through Butter., a New England-based company that specialises in Yoga Sculpt – an energising class that blends yoga, strength training, and upbeat music to get your body moving and your endorphins flowing. It's a full-body workout that brings a joyful, grounded energy to the start of your day. They also offer calming vinyasa-style sessions upon request, perfect for settling nerves and creating connection with your bridal party.
Whether you share this space with others or keep it just for you, how you begin will shape how you remember the hours that follow.
2. Pad Your Timeline (Generously)
Here’s the truth no one tells you: everything takes longer than you think.
Hair and makeup always run over time. Always.
Transportation delays, especially between venues or scenic photo locations, can easily eat into your schedule.
Zipping dresses, pinning boutonnieres, finding a lost earring – these all add up.
So instead of stacking your timeline like a game of Jenga, leave wide margins. You won’t regret having extra time. You will regret rushing.
3. Get Ready in a Space that Feels Like You
A cluttered hotel room with bad lighting and no mirrors? Not the vibe. Choose a preparation space that’s calm, beautiful, and big enough for everyone to spread out without stepping over shoes and garment bags. Natural light is your best friend, both for your photos and your peace of mind. It’s your sanctuary before the day begins.
Pro tip: set aside a designated area for bags, snacks, and all the bits and pieces that inevitably come with wedding day prep. From a photographer's perspective, a clean and tidy space makes all the difference – it allows the beauty of the moment (and the room) to shine through, without background clutter sneaking into every frame.
4. Schedule a First Look (You Won’t Regret It)
A first look isn’t just a photo op – it’s one of the most grounding, emotional, and genuinely useful parts of the entire wedding day. It gives you a chance to see each other before the ceremony in a quiet, unhurried moment – just the two of you. No audience, no pressure. Just love.
The emotional weight of seeing your partner for the first time is something incredibly special, and couples often tell me it’s the moment they actually felt the day begin. It slows everything down. It brings you into your body, into the present, and into each other’s arms.
From a timeline perspective, a first look opens up the entire day. We can capture your portraits, bridal party photos, and even some family formals before the ceremony, which means you get to enjoy cocktail hour with your guests instead of disappearing for an hour of photos.
It also acts as a beautiful pressure valve. So many nerves melt away once you’ve seen each other. You can laugh, cry, hug, breathe – and do it all without dozens of eyes watching.
If I could gently insist on one thing for every couple I work with, it would be this: give yourselves that private, sacred moment.
5. Carve Out Time for Just the Two of You
One of the best-kept secrets of the wedding day? Your couple’s portrait session.
This isn’t just about beautiful imagery (though trust me, these are the portraits that end up framed on your walls). It’s about carving out intentional space to simply be together amid the swirl of celebration.
If you’ve opted not to do a first look, this time becomes even more essential. Without earlier portraits, we’ll need to set aside a solid pocket of time between the ceremony and reception to capture your couple photos. That means planning for this session with care — not just squeezing it in. The more breathing room we have, the more relaxed and genuine the photos will feel.
Whether before the ceremony or after, this is your moment to reconnect, to breathe together, to let the day settle in. So don’t rush it. Let it be a pause in the story — one filled with light, quiet joy, and deep presence.
6. Plan for the Family Formals to Take Forever (Because They Might)
It’s one of the most underestimated parts of the day. Even with a printed list and the best intentions, family formals always take longer than expected.
Build in buffer time. Assign a point person (someone who knows the extended family) to help gather people. For all my clients, I always have a list, yes, but it's still important to prepare for improvisation. And above all, stay flexible. These are precious moments with the people who made you.
7. Keep Snacks, Water, and a Calm Friend Nearby
Dehydration and hanger are real villains on a wedding day.
Have a small spread of nourishing snacks, water bottles, and maybe even a glass of bubbly on standby throughout the day. And keep a calm, grounding presence nearby – someone who isn’t panicking about the seating chart or bustling the dress. Sometimes a deep breath and a kind word make all the difference (and yes, I can for sure be that person for you!).
8. Let Someone Else Be the Timekeeper
You should not be looking at your phone all day. That’s what coordinators, planners, and yes, even photographers like me, are here for.
If you haven’t hired a day-of coordinator, assign a trusted friend to gently keep things on track. The fewer logistics you’re juggling, the more present you can be in your own memories. This should also be a job for your photographer, so put trust in the accomplished and experienced vendors you've invited into your day.
9. Embrace the Unscripted Moments
Something will go differently than planned. That’s not a flaw – it’s the heartbeat of the day.
Rain, late arrivals, wind-swept hair, happy tears during the vows – these are the raw, unrehearsed moments that make your wedding yours. When you release perfection, presence becomes possible.
10. End the Night with a Private Last Dance or Exit
Before the lights come on and the clean-up begins, sneak away for a last slow dance. Or step out into the night for a private moment beneath the stars.
These small rituals become the bookmarks of your day. And they’re often the most emotionally resonant memories couples take with them.
11. Bonus: Build a Timeline That Breathes – With Me!
Part of my job as your photographer is to help you shape a photo timeline that isn’t just efficient, but soulful. I know where the light falls best. I know when to whisk you away for portraits and when to hold back.
When we plan together, we build in the space your love story deserves.
Get in touch with me here to start making your dream day a reality.
SUmming Up: Your Day Should Feel Like Yours
The most beautiful weddings aren’t the most expensive or the most extravagant – they’re the ones where the couple feels deeply, wildly present. Where time slows for vows, for laughter, for the way you held each other on the edge of golden light.
So let’s make that kind of day together.